Hi everybody. More of a personal message today. To be honest, I'm struggling for words to write in the aftermath of the tragic earthquake which struck a week ago. When you witness the terrible scenes that are so readily available on TV and the various news websites, you struggle for the words to actually make sense of what you are feeling and indeed seeing. It certainly puts life in perspective...and is a stark reminder as to what is really important in life. A reminder that family, friends and relationships are what life is really about.
The day it happened, we called up a few photos of damaged buildings on the NZ Herald website but it wasn't until I got home that the full scale of things became apparent. The next day, most of the children in my class were recounting scenes seen on T.V. Because of technology, images can be screened into our homes within seconds of it happening. They recounted the damage, the miraculous tales of survival, the lives lost and a whole host of other facts related to what they had seen or heard.
I see that with so many images appearing on a daily basis, New Zealand Clinical Psychologist and author on parenting Nigel Latta, made reference to the point of limiting children's exposure to the scenes (especially young children). This is to prevent children having nightmares and becoming too scared. I have to agree. It is really important to monitor what our children are seeing.
Children have a natural resilience to events like this to some degree. However when bombarded with endless images of destruction, despair and in some tragic cases, death, that resilience can be broken and can leave a lasting impression. Children prone to worry and stress, or who have other things going on in their lives, can become affected by what they are seeing to the point that they worry and can't stop thinking about it. I'm sure there are many children in Canterbury who have seen it first hand where this is the case. And it's not just the earthquake...monitor as best you can the movies or DVDs your children watch, the games they play on the computer (Internet and bought/downloaded games) and the magazines and books they read. Many children are viewing material that is completely beyond the level that they should be exposed too at such a young age. You only have to ease drop into many of the conversations that go on before or after school to know what they are reading or seeing. And you only have to watch their behaviour at school to see that sometimes this affects their thinking and behaviour.
You can read the small NZ Herald article from Nigel Latta here or click through to his website
After asking a few children how we could help before school and generating some discussion, I walked away to do some prep for the day. When I came back, I was immensely proud of what I saw. A group of 6-7 children were busy brainstorming everything they could do to help. Their conversation became louder and louder as the ideas kept coming and soon the group grew to become more of a large mass than a small group. So it got me thinking...what could children learn from such a tragic event?
Firstly, I believe that even from a young age, that they can learn about what is really important in life. It's not money, or toys, or sport or anything else. As I said above, it's about family, about friends, about relationships, about life. Many will pick up on this fact through the images they see. For others, a discussion about how caring for one another is far more important than any wordly possession, that can be destroyed in the blink of an eye. My own father-in-law and family lost much of what they own...but I'm just glad they are alive and safe and not hurt physically in any way.
Secondly, they can learn the importance of being prepared. While we couldn't predict the earthquake, its magnitude or its impact, we can be as prepared as possible. In the aftermath of Tuesday's events we spent the next few days in class discussing earthquakes, their effects, what to do if one struck and how to prepare an emergency kit. There were many questions that popped up during this discussion and this brought home the fact that children think about these things. Some will think very deeply and become very concerned. So we can prepare ourselves by knowing what to do and having a kit ready. I did a quick survey and only nine families out of 31 had an emergency survival kit ready to go. It is now something that has become a priority in my household even after the stark warning of the first earthquake in September. Create an emergency plan and talk with your children about what to do.
You can check out New Zealand Civil Defence information here. In particular read up on Emergency Survival Kits and Plans I will be sending home the Emergency Household Checklist available as a PDF on the Survival Kit page as a reminder for parents to prepare.
And thirdly, they can learn strategies for dealing with grief. Situations like this are exactly why we teach a Change, Loss and Grief programme. We are all affected by the images and we all need ways of dealing with what we are trying to make sense of. For some it will be talking with other people. For others, it will be sport, or art, or music, or writing in a journal. Children are no different. They need to be checked on, to make sure they are actually dealing with it in a positive fashion. They need to be reminded that there are different ways of responding to the event. A reminder of prior learning in this area and you will be surprised at what they have learnt in this area.
And we can learn from our children themselves. They have a natural and infectious energy to want to help. Their first thought in my class was to give. And so we will be, on Red and Black day this Friday. Then they began thinking...making cards to send down, donations of food and supplies, making posters to put around the community to highlight the need to give and the more musically inclined wanted to practise and record a song which could then be sold to raise money. Now that blows me away. Children see solutions, they very rarely focus on all the potential problems or things that get in the way. There are no roadblocks - if only we could master the way they pitch in, solve problems and think as 'high as the sky'. Let's capture their infectious joy to help and pitch in and do everything we can for the people of Canterbury.
The day it happened, we called up a few photos of damaged buildings on the NZ Herald website but it wasn't until I got home that the full scale of things became apparent. The next day, most of the children in my class were recounting scenes seen on T.V. Because of technology, images can be screened into our homes within seconds of it happening. They recounted the damage, the miraculous tales of survival, the lives lost and a whole host of other facts related to what they had seen or heard.
I see that with so many images appearing on a daily basis, New Zealand Clinical Psychologist and author on parenting Nigel Latta, made reference to the point of limiting children's exposure to the scenes (especially young children). This is to prevent children having nightmares and becoming too scared. I have to agree. It is really important to monitor what our children are seeing.
Children have a natural resilience to events like this to some degree. However when bombarded with endless images of destruction, despair and in some tragic cases, death, that resilience can be broken and can leave a lasting impression. Children prone to worry and stress, or who have other things going on in their lives, can become affected by what they are seeing to the point that they worry and can't stop thinking about it. I'm sure there are many children in Canterbury who have seen it first hand where this is the case. And it's not just the earthquake...monitor as best you can the movies or DVDs your children watch, the games they play on the computer (Internet and bought/downloaded games) and the magazines and books they read. Many children are viewing material that is completely beyond the level that they should be exposed too at such a young age. You only have to ease drop into many of the conversations that go on before or after school to know what they are reading or seeing. And you only have to watch their behaviour at school to see that sometimes this affects their thinking and behaviour.
You can read the small NZ Herald article from Nigel Latta here or click through to his website
After asking a few children how we could help before school and generating some discussion, I walked away to do some prep for the day. When I came back, I was immensely proud of what I saw. A group of 6-7 children were busy brainstorming everything they could do to help. Their conversation became louder and louder as the ideas kept coming and soon the group grew to become more of a large mass than a small group. So it got me thinking...what could children learn from such a tragic event?
Firstly, I believe that even from a young age, that they can learn about what is really important in life. It's not money, or toys, or sport or anything else. As I said above, it's about family, about friends, about relationships, about life. Many will pick up on this fact through the images they see. For others, a discussion about how caring for one another is far more important than any wordly possession, that can be destroyed in the blink of an eye. My own father-in-law and family lost much of what they own...but I'm just glad they are alive and safe and not hurt physically in any way.
Secondly, they can learn the importance of being prepared. While we couldn't predict the earthquake, its magnitude or its impact, we can be as prepared as possible. In the aftermath of Tuesday's events we spent the next few days in class discussing earthquakes, their effects, what to do if one struck and how to prepare an emergency kit. There were many questions that popped up during this discussion and this brought home the fact that children think about these things. Some will think very deeply and become very concerned. So we can prepare ourselves by knowing what to do and having a kit ready. I did a quick survey and only nine families out of 31 had an emergency survival kit ready to go. It is now something that has become a priority in my household even after the stark warning of the first earthquake in September. Create an emergency plan and talk with your children about what to do.
You can check out New Zealand Civil Defence information here. In particular read up on Emergency Survival Kits and Plans I will be sending home the Emergency Household Checklist available as a PDF on the Survival Kit page as a reminder for parents to prepare.
And thirdly, they can learn strategies for dealing with grief. Situations like this are exactly why we teach a Change, Loss and Grief programme. We are all affected by the images and we all need ways of dealing with what we are trying to make sense of. For some it will be talking with other people. For others, it will be sport, or art, or music, or writing in a journal. Children are no different. They need to be checked on, to make sure they are actually dealing with it in a positive fashion. They need to be reminded that there are different ways of responding to the event. A reminder of prior learning in this area and you will be surprised at what they have learnt in this area.
And we can learn from our children themselves. They have a natural and infectious energy to want to help. Their first thought in my class was to give. And so we will be, on Red and Black day this Friday. Then they began thinking...making cards to send down, donations of food and supplies, making posters to put around the community to highlight the need to give and the more musically inclined wanted to practise and record a song which could then be sold to raise money. Now that blows me away. Children see solutions, they very rarely focus on all the potential problems or things that get in the way. There are no roadblocks - if only we could master the way they pitch in, solve problems and think as 'high as the sky'. Let's capture their infectious joy to help and pitch in and do everything we can for the people of Canterbury.